Tuesday, 10 March 2009

Quitting

Quitting, giving up, throwing the towel in - call it what you like it all amounts to the same thing. I like to think this is something I do rarely and never without good cause, however, Hermione is very hasty in jumping to this decision.

A few weeks ago she was specially selected by her leader at Badgers (St John's Ambulance Youth) to be put forward for a competition. She didn't have to do it, she was given the choice and chose to do it. Since then her Badger leader has given up her time to fit in extra practice sessions, pretend casualties have given up their time to be practised upon and Craig has given up time to take her to the extra sessions.

This morning over tea and toast she announced that she wouldn't be entering the competition. Apparently she doesn't want to do it because she may make some mistakes and she may not know all of her casualties.

In the past I possibly would have just gone with her wishes, but I really think she is coming of an age now where she is capable of understanding about inconveniencing other people and the need to take responsibility for the decisions we make in life. Obviously were there a huge issue and she were loosing sleep it would be differed but to be honest the whole situation smacks of 'it's getting a bit tricky now so I'd rather not be ar$ed'.

There has been talk on a local list recently about parental ambition and whether or not it is right to ever 'push' your child. Can you push your child and still love them unconditionally? In pushing your child are you living your life through them? All of these issues have been raised.

Not sure what I think in the wider scheme of it but for now have decided that if she really doesn't want to do it then that is fine but she must contact her Badger Leader and explain for herself - after all she required no involvement from anyone else to arrange being in the competition! She has since decided she may not call and may stay in the competition instead.

Oh, grumble grumble....

On a brighter note it's been ever so sunny today. We have started digging over the patch, have planted some shallots and another half a dozen broad beans out, sewed some chard and perpetual spinach under plastic and sewed leeks and gourds in pots indoors. Incidentally, can you remember when I told you about our ornamental gourds from Thompson and Morgan? Well, if you were thinking about buying them then don't! The sales literature is very misleading about the number of seeds you actually receive. Oh, more grumble grumble...

Well, I'm off now to finish making crochet cupcakes for an order I hope to dispatch tomorrow.

7 comments:

Bridget said...

I know what you mean about the quitting thing. I try to teach mine to see things through to the end, if you didn't like doing it then remember not to do it again. We had this with Eden and the church choir, she begged us to join and after about 6 weeks decided she didn't like it any more. I made her tell them, I didn't prepare the way for her at all. I think it's a lifes lesson they need to learn.
On another note have you been watching "Grow your own drugs" BBC2 Mondays 8-30pm? Every time I watch it , it makes me think of you. I think you would love it

Claire said...

*Every time I watch it , it makes me think of you. I think you would love it*

Oh that made me laugh! I haven't seen it so I'm not sure if I should be flattered or offended but I'll certainly be watching it next week - or possibly tonight if BBC2 has that online repeat service, IPlayer or whatever it is...

Mam said...

Gahh. My children are champion quitters - they do stuff for a few weeks then get bored. Pushing them just does not seem to work.

Since so far none of them has shown potential to be an Olympic Gymnast, member of the Philharmonic Orchestra or Royal Ballet, or a Karate Dan, I've decided for now to opt for the least stressful route having ahd my fingers burned by some humungous tantrums when trying to get them to stick with stuff. No idea what I'd do if they were showing potential, that's a huge debate.

I did try to get them to practice during their brief flirtations with various instruments - that was part of the deal since I was paying for the lessons. Just ten minutes four times a week and they learned it made the lessons more fun ... but still dropped out anyway.

My eldest stuck with Brownies and has now done Guides for 6 months, so things are improving!!

Hazel xx

Claire said...

Yes we have had similar scenarios with music too. Hermione plays in an Academy and goes through phases of really not wanting to go - however, now there is a real threat that the Academy is going to close down due to lack of funding she's suddenly all for it - very irritating!

Bridget said...

Claire, it's definitely a compliment. I really admire your knowledge of plants and veg and their benefits. I wish I was more knowledgable on things like that.
You come across as an Earth Mother, again a compliment! I've always wanted to be one of them!

Claire said...

Earth Mother...hmmm yes I can relate to that :-)

Denise said...

I think by insisting they tell the person they are letting down it is an extremely valuable lesson, I know it is definitely a can't be bothered thing if Nathan does it.